OK my darling, we’ve all been there…we worry incessantly about something and we just can’t stop thinking about it.  Maybe you are worried about those night shifts when you are on your own – in fact in talking to a few fire wives, this certainly has been a concern sometimes at night, or maybe you are concerned about your firefighter’s mental health currently.  Trust me, I’ve been there and we need to take bold steps, I mean, really BOLD steps in that area of our life to fix it.  Don’t wait on what is worrying you, deal with it.  There is a solution for everything.  So here is what I want you to do (and I wrote about this in my book Fire Wife), I want you to put your analytical, rational thinking part of your brain to work – like an imaginary no-nonsense German grandmother, or Cher’s character in Moonstruck who tells her lover to snap out of it.  We all have fears and worries from time to time, but in not dealing with it, our day is overwhelming and not happy and you deserve to be happy.

When we worry or have a fear about a particular outcome, it’s important to first decipher whether the outcome is possible or imagined.  Change what can be changed, but don’t be controlled by things that might never happen.

To start with, take a good honest look at what your fear or worry is.  Then be PROACTIVE.  Turn the fear around and take the necessary steps to arrange for the security you need, be that financial security for the future, education to upgrade your skills for another job, or something to safeguard your home so that you feel secure when your partner is working nights and you are on your own.  We can’t control the future, but we can enjoy our lives day to day, have a plan for emergencies and know that we are strong enough to deal with things as they arise.

What Action Steps Can You Take Today?  Action lessens worry.  You will actually feel the worry or fear begin to leave your body.  Take a step today, an action step toward solving whatever is on your mind:

Do you need to make a phone call?

Do you need to have THAT conversation?

Do you need to take security measures for your home for you feel safe?

Do you need to get counselling with a good counsellor to help you with solutions and a plan?

Do you need to sit down with your child to map our their next steps for school or college?

Do you need nothing but positive energy around you so you can heal and get healthy, meaning you need to take BOLD STEPS to protect your energy and your happiness say from negative people?

Also, exercising absolutely gets rid of worry or at least helps you see clear enough and bold enough to fix the problems.  We will talk more about exercise tomorrow. 

Trust, my dear, trust.  It will all work out for your best.  I know this because 13 years ago my husband was really sick.  Enough so that I thought he might die.  I thought our incredible life was over as we knew it.  But you know what?  God has a way of turning all things to good and for giving your beauty for those ashes.  Fast forward 13 years later and that man of mine, 2 hip surgeries just in this past year, is a healthy gorgeous specimen.  As well, all those years ago when I thought our beautiful life was over, it only got better!  We went on a dream trip to Europe, have travelled extensively and just this past year my one son became a firefighter and got his own home, we went to Washington DC and my other son has been travelling the world.  I LOVE IT!

Take action today with all of your worries, face things head on, take the action steps necessary and trust my dear, trust.  Things will work out even better than you could ever hope or imagine.  Have faith, create a spectacular vision for your future using the present tense and know that in time, be it a year or 13 years down the road like me and my hubby, life will be shiny, happy, joyous, abundant and successful!  Can I get an AMEN!

Written by : Tara McIntosh

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