In self-reflection and in dreaming about the good life, it is always a smart thing to go through your life, decade by decade to see when you were happiest and why. Who was in your life? What was going on in your life? It's also imperative to go [...]
Do you over commit to things in the moment but then when the time comes you wake up dreading the day? As human beings, as mothers, fathers, friends, daughters, sons, and spouses, we have commitments to our relationships and to getting certain things in our lives done. We also need [...]
Whether you are in perfect peace today or having a crappy day, beauty will bring you back. Additionally when we focus on what we find beautiful and that includes how we spend our time, what our hobbies are, the character traits we love in others, nature, a cup of tea [...]
There is a difference between having great talks with your partner and communicating to your partner. Most of us can have a laugh and good chats with our firefighter. But when there is something more serious to convey or your needs aren't getting met, or his aren't, that's when [...]
Do you know my husband and I went to a marriage counsellor and our marriage counsellor never once told us that all marriages go through very Predicable Phases and that you are completely normal when you do? So you need not feel bad if it's not wine and roses all [...]
Connecting and Communicating With Your Firefighter What Works and What Doesn't "The Quality of Your Communication is the Quality of Your Life: - Anthony Robbins I've started a new thing called, Fire Wife Notes here on my website, of all the wisdom and advice I wish I'd [...]
I made this Sunday night for dessert! I am on a diet, so come Sunday I wanted a sugar-free cheesecake and man oh man did I find the very best from The Diet Chef, online. Let me get right to the point: Preheat oven to 350 and grease up a [...]
It was the funniest thing! I was home alone when our local paper called me to get a picture for the paper with my book. So, while my arms are short as all damn hell, I managed to hold the phone in front of me with one hand, then hold [...]
Though COVID has slowed down the plans we've all had, I'm excited that I've been invited to couple of events and I'm looking forward to them! First I've been invited to participate in The Port Moody Author Gala May 11th, via Zoom and on June 16th, 2021 an interview also [...]
Put out the invitation! Pick a time to meet, where and for how long. Will one person host the book club, or will everyone take turns? Do you want to meet in a neutral place or do you want the comfort of someone’s home? Do you want to meet once [...]
Krissy is a front-line worker who works both as an ultra-sound technician and with patients who suffer liver failure from alcohol abuse. Her husband is a career firefighter and together they have a 7-year old little boy. Recently I’ve been wondering how the heck couples who are both front-line workers [...]
"It’s not the failure, it’s what you do with the failure, that’s what defines you.” – Ross Penhall Not only is Ross Penhall, a retired West Vancouver Fire Captain, having served 29 years in his city, he is also an internationally renowned landscape artist who has sold one of his [...]
There is a lot to be concerned about right now - from world economics to more locally small businesses that are suffering as well as human beings, particularly women and children in domestic abuse situations and families who are not getting enough to eat. Yes, there is a lot to [...]
The other day I talked about some resentment was bubbling up for me with respect to a person who I love very much (I don't think I mentioned love last time!) but who was affecting me greatly during this time of sequester - not my husband and not my children. [...]
Well life as we know it at this moment in history has certainly changed. We can either look at it as cozy and contented at home or confinement at home! If you are anything like me, possibly without all of the distractions of say shopping, lunch out with the girls, [...]
The trajectory of my life changed drastically when my husband wanted to become a firefighter. I had been going to college to get my media degree when he made this announcement. To say I was unhappy about his choice was an understatement. Since then however, I managed to turn what [...]
Good morning! It's a beautiful day here already on the West Coast! I went to my doctor the other day to get more blood tests to see WHY I CAN'T LOSE WEIGHT! My doctor wrote out a requisition for blood tests and then handed me a prescription for diet pills. [...]
As I put the finishing touches on my Fire Wife book, I am recounting two interviews I did with my friends who are also fire wives. Both of them have said that because a fire marriage is not an easy one, you have to really make yourself a priority. My [...]
It might be January 3rd, but the truth is, I'm still playing Christmas music, I've still got my tree up (until this weekend) and I am still taking it easy. Though the menu plan has improved and I'm going to boot camp tonight, this week is very special to me. [...]
Fire Wives at one time or another will experience PTS (post traumatic stress) just because she is married to a firefighter. While what he sees each and everyday would destroy me, the type of PTS I'm speaking of is of an interpersonal level. Whatever he experiences or whatever he puts [...]
I have a pack of virtues cards and love to sit by myself in the morning to choose two to see what character traits to practice and every time I pick a card it is never surprising but always incredible that I pick the ones I truly need. In this [...]
If you could rank your husband's bad moods on a scale from 1-10 where would they land? Recently my husband landed in hospital again. This is the third time with a low white blood cell count. He was the most insufferable person leading up to this hospitalization and I can [...]
While having my book for Firefighter Wives edited the other day my editor said, "Wow, a firefighter's life takes precedence over his wife's." It's true. From their schedule, to filling in for an extra shift, trading holidays, volunteering, sleeping and sometimes working another job - not only is it true, [...]
So Mrs. Firefighter wife, do you like those two nights on your own and how do you spend it? Do you let the house go? Do you hit the hay early with movies and popcorn in bed? Having a couple of nights a week to myself is really perfect [...]
Well, that went fast! And don't we say that every year. It would appear that I didn't even blog during the Christmas season. I love fresh starts and that is exactly what 2018 is to me, a fresh start. My old trainer, who'd just started up her company again, messaged [...]
When I was in Paris, I knew one phrase, "Je ne parle pas francais' (I don't speak French). I practiced this phrase for about 2 hours over and over again while in Paris before I could say it confidently! I felt terrible not knowing any French while in Paris, because [...]
Imagine how many relationships would stay together if the Golden Rule was practiced consistently? Do unto others as you would have done to you. Treat others as you would like to be treated. I know a lot of spouses would say, "ya but" he needs to be nice to me [...]
My firefighter texted me last night to say "sorry for what he said...I didn't mean it". The sorry was amazing because my firefighter's family M.O. was about deflecting and blaming. We've come a long way my hubby and I. Though connected by passion, charisma and shared values, when it came [...]
There are times we find those guys we are married too beyond frustrating. They seem to put more effort into their brothers at the hall than they do with their own families. Just this past week my husband worked on the boat he we share with another firefighter family, worked [...]
Well, I handed off one chapter of my book to my husband last night to take to the fire hall. The chapter I sent is called, Understanding Your Husband's Profession. So far the reviews have been great though it still needs some editing. I want to dispel any rumors out [...]
As we all know having a firefighter marriage, it can be difficult to navigate if we don't understand our husband's profession, what they deal with everyday and the results of those difficult days. It's also essentially important to check in with yourself. How are you feeling today? Is there anything [...]
I was at a retirement and new recruit dinner last night. We all sat at tables that were already designated which was a first but I love meeting new people and met some really great ones last night. I got weepy when the pageantry began as men marched into the [...]
There is a very large divorce rate amongst firefighter marriages. Divorce amongst firefighters and their wives is even higher than the national average. Why? Because it's really hard being married to a firefighter! I began writing my book several years ago because there wasn't a whole lot on the book [...]
Fortunately, not anymore, but for many years prior, and before I had THERAPY, my stomach would be in absolute knots when my firefighter was on his way home after two night shifts. Being a firefighter wife, you know what your man will be like when he gets home. I guess [...]
I have a question for you? Have you stopped to give yourself a big fat pat on the back today? I'm serious. Do you even know who you are? Today as you go about your day, your routine and your to-do-list, I want you to take a few minutes to [...]
Hi there! I am so happy to finally get my blog started before publishing my book, How to Stay Happily Married to a Firefighter. My book is how to stay happily married, because for me, this was not always the case. Once upon a time I was a very reluctant [...]
Tara McIntosh has written her first book, Fire Wife, Standing Strong in Your Relationship, Your Life and Your Dreams.
Email: info@firewifewise.com
